Welcome to Walnut Avenue’s “staff picks” page! Here, we’ve provided some books, podcasts, and other media that our staff have liked about a variety of subjects related to the services we provide. Recommendations have been sorted into broad categories, then media type, and then alphabetized by title.

Domestic Violence
(from partners and/or family members)

Books

Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry & Controlling Men
by Lundy Bancroft

Summary: In this groundbreaking bestseller, Lundy Bancroft—a counselor who specializes in working with abusive men—uses his knowledge about how abusers think to help women recognize when they are being controlled or devalued, and to find ways to get free of an abusive relationship. He says he loves you. So...why does he do that? You’ve asked yourself this question again and again. Now you have the chance to see inside the minds of angry and controlling men—and change your life.

What staff have to say: “First published in 2002, this book has become something of a staple in the field of domestic violence. Many survivors have reported finding it validating because it provides specific language to describe their experiences, which are often ignored or dismissed as them being ‘too sensitive’ or ‘looking for something to be mad about.’ That being said, the language is very gendered in a way that won’t fit every survivor’s experience, and new information and perspectives have come out within the 20 years since it was published. I think we can appreciate the areas in which it’s still relevant while recognizing the places where it’s become dated.”

Trauma & Healing

Books

The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, & Body in the Healing of Trauma
by Bessel van der Kolk, Ph.D.

Book summary: Trauma is a fact of life. Veterans and their families deal with the painful aftermath of combat; one in five Americans has been molested; one in four grew up with alcoholics; one in three couples have engaged in physical violence. Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, one of the world’s foremost experts on trauma, has spent over three decades working with survivors. In The Body Keeps the Score, he uses recent scientific advances to show how trauma literally reshapes both body and brain, compromising sufferers’ capacities for pleasure, engagement, self-control, and trust. He explores innovative treatments—from neurofeedback and meditation to sports, drama, and yoga—that offer new paths to recovery by activating the brain’s natural neuroplasticity. Based on Dr. van der Kolk’s own research and that of other leading specialists, The Body Keeps the Score exposes the tremendous power of our relationships both to hurt and to heal—and offers new hope for reclaiming lives.

What staff have to say: “I appreciate the way the author balanced his discussion of science and human emotional experience; sometimes I feel like people misuse science to invalidate very real human emotions, whereas other people might go too far in the other direction and forget the role that our physical bodies play in our perceptions and responses. And the discussion didn’t feel ‘too academic’ in a way that feels alienating for those us without a background in medicine while still providing lots of good, dense information to help understand the complexities of how trauma impacts us in myriad ways.”

I Thought It was Just Me (But It Isn't): Making the Journey from "What Will People Think?" to "I Am Enough"
by Brene Brown

Summary: THE best book on overcoming shame, understanding and working with guilt to change negative behaviors, and learning how to love ourselves. Brene Brown is a researcher who uses evidence and data to understand shame. This book discusses how the antidote to shame is vulnerability.

What staff have to say: “Shame after experiencing domestic violence is a huge barrier to healing, reconnecting, and safely coping. Learning to recognize and transform our own shame helps us heal and not make the same choices that may be hurting us.”

In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction
by Dr. Gabor Mate

Summary: This book totally overhauls conventional "wisdom" around addiction. Writing about in utero development, brain development, pleasure and reward systems, and trauma, Dr. Mate explains how addiction begins, how it's reinforced, and harm reduction responses that keep people alive who are suffering from addiction. This is a highly insightful and very compassionate look at addiction, based in science, not shame.

What staff have to say: “Domestic violence and substance abuse/misuse are highly correlated. Instead of shaming ourselves or misunderstanding our struggles, or the struggles of those we love, we can understand what's happening physiologically in an addiction cycle. Harm Reduction is a powerful tool to save lives.”

Living, Loving, and Learning
by Leo Buscaglia

Book summary: LIVING, LOVING AND LEARNING is a delightful collection of Dr. Buscaglia's informative and amusing lectures, which were delivered worldwide between 1970 and 1981. This inspirational treasure is for all those eager to accept the challenge of life and to profit from the wonder of love.

What staff have to say: “Buscaglia shares his experiences with his family as an Italian immigrant coming to the U.S to his time as a professor at USC developing a curriculum on the subject of love. He dives into the act of intimacy without oversexualizing it and the dynamics of relationships from a compassionate POV. He makes sensitive topics, like suicide and individualistic tendencies more digestible. He stresses the value in reparenting yourself by unlearning and building a solid community.”

When Things Fall Apart
by Pema Chodron

Book summary: This is a book about accepting groundlessness, times of crises, and the vulnerability of suffering. Written by a Buddhist monk, this book approaches problems as the spiritual path we all must walk to open ourselves up to life's lessons.

What staff have to say: “This book helped me cope with the early days of Covid. Sometimes Pema says things that made me so mad, I threw the book across the floor...only to pick it up again because I knew there was a lot of wisdom in her words.”

Wild Comfort: The Solace of Nature
by Kathleen Deen Moore

Summary: This is a beautiful nature writing book about grief, with each chapter detailing lessons learned from natural observations on the cycle of life, resilience, and recovery.

What staff have to say: “One of the most beautiful books I've ever read. I gift it to everyone I know going through a hard time. It's subtle and beautiful and changed how I viewed the world.”

Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times
by Katherine May

Summary: Breaking down the idea of winter, rest, and taking a break, this book discusses what it means to fully withdraw to care for ourselves. The author moves through different winter traditions around the world, explains wintering processes for plants and nature, and relates it to her own "wintering season" where she and her son needed a respite from the world.

What staff have to say: “This is an excellent book for those of us getting out a hard time, struggling with winter related sadness or Seasonal Affective Disorder, or who are just in a funk.”

Podcasts

The School of Greatness
by Lewis Howes Podcast (YouTube Channel)

Channel summary: The goal of the School of Greatness is to share inspiring stories from the most brilliant business minds, world class athletes and influential celebrities on the planet to help you find out what makes great people great.

What staff have to say: “Lewis Howes is a light-hearted survivor of childhood SA, where he created a platform to conversate with educators, authors, and philosophers on how to get through the challenges of everyday life. He shares his struggles with toxic masculinity and identity as an athlete that struggled with poor academic performance. Many of the tips and tricks are useful to creating a more balanced and purposeful life.”

The Ultimate Health Podcast
by Jesse Chappus Podcast (on most social platforms)

Website summary: Jesse and Marni teach and inspire you to reach your maximum potential in the realm of health. They interview world-class experts in the health & wellness community. Topics include lifestyle, nutrition, fitness, self-help, sleep, meditation, and spirituality. Jesse and Marni also tackle a health topic they are passionate about during their Focus Friday episodes. Either way, they’ll take your health to the next level!

What staff have to say: “I am a big fan of this podcast because it reminds me to keep up a mindful attitude from the perspective of experienced professionals from all walks of life. They discuss methodologies that have worked for people that are realistic, sustainable, and unconventional at times. Overall, this podcast allows you to learn as you listen and remember that healthy living is whatever you make it.”

Families, Parenting, & Child Development

Books

Positive Discipline: The Classic Guide to Helping Children Develop Self-Discipline, Responsibility, Cooperation, and Problem-Solving Skills
by Jane Nelsen

For twenty-five years, Positive Discipline has been the gold standard reference for grown-ups working with children. Now Jane Nelsen, distinguished psychologist, educator, and mother of seven, has written a revised and expanded edition. The key to positive discipline is not punishment, she tells us, but mutual respect. Nelsen coaches parents and teachers to be both firm and kind, so that any child–from a three-year-old toddler to a rebellious teenager–can learn creative cooperation and self-discipline with no loss of dignity. Inside you’ll discover how to bridge communication gaps, defuse power struggles, avoid the dangers of praise, enforce your message of love, build on strengths, not weaknesses, hold children accountable with their self-respect intact, teach children not what to think but how to think, win cooperation at home and at school, and meet the special challenge of teen misbehavior.

What staff have to say: “I really appreciate how this book starts from the position of assuming that every person is driven by the need for connection with others, and over time that need can be nurtured into something healthy and authentic or something that causes hurt. That reflects my own experience as both a survivor and having been a domestic violence advocate. It acknowledges that children do need support and guidance — they can’t be running wild with scissors, after all — but that using parenting tactics based on fear and control aren’t helpful either. But it also provides some practical advice on how to actually put these strategies into practice rather than just preaching at parents who are tired of being criticized for being human. Highly recommend.”

Justice & Accountability

Books

Beyond Survival: Strategies and Stories from the Transformative Justice Movement
edited by Ejeris Dixon and Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha

Book summary: In this collection, a diverse group of authors focuses on concrete and practical forms of redress and accountability, assessing existing practices and marking paths forward. They use a variety of forms—from toolkits to personal essays—to delve deeply into the “how to” of transformative justice, providing alternatives to calling the police, ways to support people having mental health crises, stories of community-based murder investigations, and much more. At the same time, they document the history of this radical movement, creating space for long-time organizers to reflect on victories, struggles, mistakes, and transformations.

What staff have to say: “It can be hard to imagine alternative forms of justice that don’t involve policing and incarceration, especially when ‘justice’ isn’t going to look the same for every situation. I really appreciate seeing a variety of approaches, which I thinks helps illustrate how some fundamental principles can be manifested differently to meet the unique needs of individual survivors, people who have caused harm, and their communities.”

Decriminalizing Domestic Violence: A Balanced Policy Approach
by Leigh Goodmark

Summary: This book tackles the modern question of how to prevent, respond to, and stop domestic violence when criminalization and prisons have failed to lower or stop domestic violence in our society. Tackling the issue from a policy, public health, human rights, and economic lens, Leigh Goodmark makes a compelling argument for alternative approaches that should be done in tandem with the criminal justice system, to make prisons the last possible resource for responding to domestic violence.

What staff have to say: “Current systems and the move to criminalize DV did not prevent, stop, or reduce it. We are failing to address the root causes of violence as a society. Leigh Goodmark is one of the most forward thinking authors I've ever encountered.”

Are Prisons Obsolete?
by Angela Davis

Summary: A short book that outlines the history of and current social uses of prisons to disappear social problems, offering some alternatives to consider. The book answers the questions "do we need prisons?" and "what is the role of a prison in our society?"

What staff have to say: “This book addresses the harms of prisons and outlines how the prison industrial complex is perpetuated, leading to more violence. It's a short, straight forward read.”

Gender

Books

Beyond the Gender Binary
by Alok Vaid-Menon

Book summary: In Beyond the Gender Binary, poet, artist, and LGBTQIA+ rights advocate Alok Vaid-Menon deconstructs, demystifies, and reimagines the gender binary.

What staff have to say: “At only 64 pages, this is an easy and accessible way of engaging with a nonbinary experience of gender without sacrificing its depth, meaning, or impact.”

Coming Out, Again: Transition Stories
by Sabrina Symington

Book summary: Following the interconnected lives of a diverse queer community - including asexual, polyamorous, trans and autigender people - this empowering graphic novel explores the multitude of ways a person's identity and relationships can be expressed and can change over time. From Lily coming out as a lesbian after coming out as a trans woman, to Leanne embracing their genderqueer identity in later life, to Ty navigating their queerness with their autistic identity, these stories illustrate how life lived at the intersection of gender, sexuality, race and class is often a journey with many chapters. Full of love and pride - as well as tips and advice - these witty, tender and inspiring narratives prove there is no wrong way to be who you are, so long as you are being true to yourself.

What staff have to say: “I love queer anthologies like this because there’s so much diversity in the general human experience, even among folks who don’t consider themselves LGBTQ, that seeing similar themes spread out across a large canvas makes it easier for me to see both the similarities and differences in my own queer experience in a way that feels rich, gorgeous, and affirming.”